Set yourself up to succeed!
October 25, 2003 by Michael Smalley
I can’t be passionate enough about the topic of purity. It’s not about saying “no” to sex, but rather it’s about saying “what is the best way to experience sex?” Without a doubt, sex is intended for marriage because it is the only relationship on earth that can handle the intensity of emotions created through sex. Outside of a marital commitment, sex will destroy your relationship. Very few people ever end up marrying the first person they have sex with.
So set yourself up to succeed in your sexual purity before marriage. Date the kind of person who shares your values around sex. Someone who is equally committed to keeping sex out of the relationship until marriage. If you don’t, you will fail. Especially guys who are laden with the hormone Testosterone. If you don’t date a young lady who is committed to leaving sex out of your dating relationship, I’m telling you, you won’t survive a month!
Keep the boundaries in terms of how far you go physically. I always recommend nothing passed simple kisses (this is not “making out”). I mean the kind of kisses you’d give at a door after a fun dinner or at the airport in public before you went through security. Long, passionate kissing will only lead you to other more in depth physical activity. Once you go down the road, it’s very difficult to stop.
For those who’ve already had sex, remember, it’s never too late to stop. It will take serious dedication, but you can do it! It’s worth stopping. Sleeping with more people just because you’ve already had sex once, doesn’t change the consequences of promiscuity. You don’t want the memories of multiple partners haunting your wedding night. Keep strong and pray for God’s desire in your dating life.
Michael
For more help in keeping your relationships healthy, please refer to the Don’t Date Naked book and the DDN workbook (an excellent study guide and accountability group resource)
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